1-1-11-Prayer

1-1-11-Prayer

"Pray for us.  We are sure that we have a clear conscience and desire to live honorably in everyway.  I particularly urge you to pray so that I may be restored to you soon." (Heb. 13:18-19).

Leaders recognize the need for prayer, Christian leaders are especially vulnerable to criticism from others, pride (if they succeed); depression (if they fail), and Satan's constant efforts to destroy their work for God.  They desperately need our prayers!

For whom should you regularly pray?

Read John 17:1-26

Jesus prayed for his disciples, including those of us who follow him today.  He prayed that God would keep his chosen believers safe from Satan's power, setting them apart and making them pure and holy uniting them through his truth.  The lives of Jesus' disciples reveal his character, and he is present to the world through them.

Does your life reveal Jesus' character and presence?

Jesus prayed for all who would follow him, including you and others you know.  He prayed for unity, protection from the evil one,  and sanctity (holiness), knowing that Jesus prayed for us should give us confidence as we work for his kingdom.

What two phrases sum up your goal for the past year?  How does this relate to God's purpose?

How are your prayers for others like and unlike Jesus' prayer?  Do you prayers reflect the short-term urgent, or the long-term important needs that people have?

If Jesus prayed only for the urgent needs of his disciples, how would this prayer be different?

Goals

Participants may:

1. Discuss together the what and the how of prayer.

2. Deepen their relationships with one another by seeking God in prayer with other group members.

3. Experience together the joys and difficulties of prayer.

4. Become better able to pray with others.

5. Experience Christian community in prayer.

Opening Prayer

Lord God, you invite us to approach you freely in prayer.  Teach us to approach you confidently both alone and in the company of others.  Teach us how to lead others into your presence, to go hand-in-hand with them to the throne of grace and love. Amen.

Lead-In

In this lesson, we will learn more about prayer by discussing it and praying together.  We will explore our own feeling about prayer.  We will explore what intimacy with God and with each other can mean as we pray to him.

Prayer

Prayer is supposed to be matter-of-fact for Christian, taken for granted as part of the faith environment.  Yet it remains one of the most difficult resources to use appropriately and effectively in training relationships.  This is true for clergy and laity alike, but especially for lay people.  Many believe that praying with someone is a right limited to clergy.  Nothing could be further from the truth.  It  is every Christian's right and responsibility to pray with others as the opportunity arises.

A major reason people are reluctant to pray with others is their uncertainty as to how to go about it.  They are unsure about why they should pray with others,  when to pray, how to pray, what to pray about, and even where to pray.

While the focus of this lesson will be the use of prayer in more-or-less structured training sessions, much of this material will apply to  everyday encounters with others.  I hope this lesson will reaffirm your existing skills and suggest new ways to use prayer in training situations.

Why Pray with Others

God invites his people to draw near and share their concerns with him by means of prayer.  God also specifically invites his people to approach him in prayer together.  James 5:16 urges "Pray for one another."  The context clearly shows that the reference is to two or more people praying together.

Not only do we pray for each other because God urged it; we also pray together because Jesus added his special promises to shared prayer:

"Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven.  For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I in the midst of them" (Matt. 18:19-20).

What a powerful incentive to pray together!  When you pray with another, God is the third party in a training relationship, actively concerned for you and for the person with whom you are praying.  In prayer God has promised to listen to you attentively, to understand your needs, and to answer your requests.  Thus, your motivation for praying with others extends far beyond the fulfillment of a religious formality.

Another reason for mutual prayer is the beneficial effects on your relationship with the other person.  Consider what an intimate personal experience prayer is.  As you are honest with the God "from whom no secrets are hid,"  you are also honest and open with each other.  As you draw nearer to God, you will naturally draw closer to each other.

Intimacy that grows as a result of joint prayer, is intimacy seldom experienced in contemporary society.

Jesus said:

"But when you pray, go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you" (Matt. 6:6).

Some people think this means that prayer always needs to be very private and personal, taking place only between God and the person.  The context shows that Jesus is warning against false piety, not against praying together.  He is warning people against parading their religiosity for others to see.  Your purpose in praying with others is very different.  You are sharing their burdens and involving God in the process.

When to Pray

When It's Natural

Prayer should come as a natural part of a total visit.  Because prayer cannot be programmed beforehand, You need to determine the proper moment to pray.  That judgment depends on the other person's needs, not yours.  In other words, don't pray when you are ready to pray,  but when the other person is ready.  Careful listening will help you ascertain when prayer is appropriate.  Your goal is for prayer to be a natural part of your conversation, not an intrusion or  interruption.

Not as an Injection

Prayer should not be tacked on to a visit artificially.  It is not an injection enabling you suddenly to bring in the Christian viewpoint.  If a visit has not demonstrated Christian.  If for some reason you do not include a prayer, this does not mean that  your visit is not distinctively Christian.  Whether you pray or not, your entire visit must reflect Christian distinctiveness through your love and care for the other person.  When you pray, it needs to be part of a total Christian visit.

Not as a Technique for Leaving

Although it is a common practice to close a visit with prayer, you occasionally might want to pray with people at times other than the end of a visit.  Prayer is not a technique for closing a visit.  There are obvious and better ways to close such as:

• Good-bye, I enjoyed talking with you today.

• How about if we get together again.

• I need to go now.

A danger of always closing with prayer is that the individual you visit might come to look on the prayer as a way to say good-bye rather than communication with God.  The person might feel disappointed when you mention prayer, because it signals that you will be leaving.  Remember that prayer can come appropriately at any time during a visit.

Not to Manipulate

There is always the danger that prayer might be used as a means of manipulating another into action that you want to see happen.

This prayer is merely an attempt to force the person's hand by arousing feelings of guilt.  A prayer of this sort will probably have negative results.  If the other person expresses a desire to pray for a change of heart on some matter, that's different.  Then, the prayer is coming from the expressed needs of the other person, not your own hidden needs.

How to Pray

Introducing Prayer

Initiating prayer is awkward for some people.  What do you say when you sense that prayer is appropriate?  You might want to avoid a simple declaration like, "Let us pray."  You might say something like:

• Would you appreciate a prayer right now?

• We have talked about this problem and you have expressed a lot of feelings.  Would you like to share these with God in prayer?

• You have set a personal goal for yourself.  Would you like to pray about it, asking God for his help?

• I'm really glad things have gone well with you this week.  Shall we share our thanks with God in prayer?

These introductions leave the individual with a choice.  Prayer needs to be a willing response if it is to be true prayer.

When the Person Says No

Most of the time, when you ask someone if he or she would like to pray, your suggestion will be welcome.  Of course, the person can also say no.  On those occasions, he or she will usually give a reason.

One reason could be that the person has already prayed extensively about the matter.  If this is the case, remember that prayer should be based on the other person's needs, not yours.

Sometimes people say no to  prayer because they don't like to pray.  Although you have excellent reasons why prayer is beneficial, you can't force another to value prayer in the same way.  To force prayer on someone can achieve opposite results from those you intend.

People could also say no to prayer because they prefer to pray privately and are reluctant to ptay with someone else.  While you need to respect their feelings, you might want to explain gently the benefits and joys of praying together.  However, the final decision on whether or not to pray is theirs.

Whatever reason people have for saying no to prayer, you need not become defensive, nor think that you are being rejected.  Moreover, as your relationship develops there might be other occasions when the person will feel more open to prayer.  Be patient.

Addressing God

In prayer of any kind, you begin by addressing God.  But what kind of God are you inviting into the relationship?  Remember that God invites you to address him as your loving Father.  Remember - and let your prayers show it - that God is a loving God who involves himself in the lives of his children.  Jesus Christ, God's Son, became a human being and shared in all of human experience.  He truly understands all of what you talk about when you pray to him, and knew it beforehand.  Remember it is His will that is important, not His children's will.  The prayer is for us to use as a way of understanding our relationship to Him.

Honesty

Do not avoid the pain and apparent injustice of a situation.  Some people think they have to "Clean up" their thoughts when they talk to God.  To them feelings like anger, sadness, bitterness, or fear have no place in prayer.  Consequently, they end up being dishonest with God.  Martin Luther's first rule of prayer is "Don't lie to God."  Feel free to share all emotions and experiences with God.  God is loving and understanding and wants honesty from us, not prettied-up piety.

It is only by sharing painful moments honestly with God that people find themselves able to grow.

Choosing Meaningful Words

Be sensitive to the needs and expectations of the person you are with.  Choose language that the other person understands and with which he or she is comfortable.  While the age of the person can affect your choice  of words, you need not use language you are unfamiliar with, like slang with a teenager if you are an adult.  Rather, choose words that are natural for both of you.  You might want to avoid religious expressions such as "thee," and "thou" unless that is more comfortable for you and the other person.

It is possible to be excessively critical of language or style.  If you find yourself stumbling along and groping for words, keep going.

What to Pray About

Pray about what you and the person you are training wish to clarify in both of your minds, the relationship of the trainee to his God.  This prevents vague prayer and renders it more meaningful for the other person.  Both you and the other person will benefit if you are clear about the relationship you will bring to God before you pray.

Building a Prayer

Building a prayer simply means that you and the person discuss what needs to go in the prayer before you start to pray.  As you build a prayer, you discover the needs of the individual by asking open-ended questions, enabling the person to express his or her real concerns.

When Someone Asks  You to Pray

On occasion another person might request a prayer.  You might be tempted to immediately fold your hands and begin praying.  But remember that prayer should meet the other person's needs - no matter who suggest it.  A good response might be something like: "I would be glad to pray with you.  Before I do, I'd like you to share with me what you're thinking about and what  you would like to clarify before your God.  I think we could share them better with God that way."  This is not an evasion technique, but a way to provide quality training.

Using Prewritten Prayers

although most of the praying I have talked about so far is extemporaneous, you could also choose to use a prayer book in your training.  Here are some specific suggestions for the use of prayers from books or other resources:

• Become well-acquainted with the prayer book you will use.  This enables you to choose appropriate prayers quickly without paging through the book while the person is waiting.

• Choose prayers that meet the needs of the individual.

• If the person's need is of a nature that the printed prayer speaks to it generally or incompletely, add a sentence or two that is more specific.

• Read the prayer in a natural voice and at your normal rate.

• The Psalms are a "prayer book within the Bible."  Become familiar enough with them through study and your own personal meditation that you can choose a psalm appropriate to a person's relationship with God without fumbling around.

• The Lord's Prayer is always appropriate, either by itself, or with another prayer.  One of its advantages is that the other person can join you.

Where to Pray

You can pray with a person anywhere, provided you adjust your style of prayer to the surroundings.  When a visit is in a private home, the setting is usually conducive to quiet moments of prayer.  But prayers can also be appropriate in public places like a hospital.  If you are with someone in a waiting room, however, you might want to postpone prayer or move to a place with fewer distractions.

Even in a patient's room, there is not always total privacy.  If another patient is in an adjoining bed, you might want to adjust your style by praying more softly with the person you are visiting.  Or, depending on the other person's religious orientation, you might want to include him or her in the prayer.  Be sensitive so as not to bully other people into being included when they do not want to be.  Remember also that the person you are visiting can be in such a state of crises, pain, or sickness that he or she really needs your undivided attention.  Don't dilute your training to someone who really needs your intensive training at that moment.

Prayer is our response to God's gracious invitation to share with Him.  It is based on a child's need to communicate and share with his Father his needs and concerns, trust and commitment, and shared love.  As you go about being a training Christian, both you and the person for whom you share in prayer will find strength and assurance, knowing what you share with God is left in the hands of God, who is a loving Father.

Suggested Prayers

Spiritual Problems and Spiritual Growth

Several Years ago, a publicity-seeking preacher announced that he would preach the shortest sermon in history.  On Sunday morning the pews were filled as the preacher stepped up to the pulpit to deliver his "sermon" which had only one word:

"Love."

At a time when the word love has so many meanings, it is possible that the congregation and perhaps even the preacher failed to realize the significance of what was being said.  The Bible tells us that God is love, that we can only love because he loved us first, and that Jesus came to die for us because of God's love.  Love has been called the mark of the Christian.  The one who does not love "does not know God," but everyone "who loves is born of God and knows God."  Clearly love is at the basis of Christianity - not the transient, self-centered sentimentalism that forms the foundation of so many modern love songs, but the giving, patient, other-centered, Christ-honoring, divinely bestowed love which is described in the pages of Scripture.

Regretfully, many Christians do not feel very loving and neither do their words or actions express a loving attitude.  Many feel defeated by sin, internal conflicts, and the pressures of life.  Some are frustrated because their growth seems to be so slow.  Others are concerned because their lives seem so joyless, there is no "sparkle" in their worship, and they are caught in a net of "spiritual dryness."  They read the Bible but the words seem dull and irrelevant.  They pray, more out of habit than desire, but their actions aren't very loving and their consciences seem insensitive and blunted.

This is not a state which God desires, but it is a common experience, perhaps even in the lives of the trainers or potential trainers who read these words.  Training those who have spiritual problems is a challenge at any time, but it is even more difficult when the trainer struggles with problems similar to those of the trainees.

Periods of spiritual dryness cause a tremendous amount of suffering in the life of a Christian....  Inwardly everything is dead in him....  But the world around him needs and expects his love.  The sick and the dying want to be comforted.  Hurt and lonely people want to be understood.  His/her family, students, congregation and fellow Christians want to be ministered to and strengthened.  Nobody really knows what desperation is who has never faced another being craving help when inside he feels completely empty and dry.

Unlike most of the previous lessons, this one can speak to the needs of trainers and trainees alike.

The Bible and Spiritual Problems

In an age when people like to be progressive, successful, and able to get things done quickly and efficiently, it is difficult for many of us to realize that God is never in a hurry.  His goal is that each believer will mature into Christlikeness, but he knows that none of us will ever succeed completely, this side of heaven.  He wants us to be holy and to follow in Christ's steps, but he knows that none of us will ever do that completely.  He wants us to "put on the whole armor of God," but he realizes that we cannot fight life's battles alone.  He wants us to present our bodies to him as "a living sacrifice," but he realizes that this presentation will not be continuing and unselfish.  He wants us to stop sinning and to flee from youthful lusts, but he realizes that we are fooling ourselves if we say we have no sin and so he tells us to confess our sins and expect forgiveness when we do fall.  He sets up a high standard for our behavior because he is just and holy, but he has provided a Savior to pay for our sins and failures because he is loving and merciful.  He has adopted us as his children and requires us to "do justice, to love kindness and to walk humbly" with God, but he is compassionate, gracious, and "abounding in loving-kindness," because he knows that we are nothing but dust so long as we remain in this world.

Clearly God has high standards.  To expect anything less than perfection for his human creatures would be to lower his standards and make him less than God.  Along with his holiness, perfection and greatness, however, there also are divine attributes of love, mercy and compassion.  God is realistic.  He knows that we are weak so he has not left us to stand alone.  Inn a spirit of love, he sent his Son to pay for our sins, and His Holy Spirit to live within, guiding, strengthening and teaching us.  We may think that he is far away, at times, but he is ever near, sticking closer than a faithful brother.

The goal of the Christian life is to be Christlike in worship, character and service.  In the Old Testament, worship included the offering of sacrifices to atone for sin.  Now that Christ has died for our sins, "once for all, the just for the unjust," we are to present our bodies, minds, spirits as a "living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God."  This commitment of self to God, along with verbal praise, is how we worship, and give honor and glory to God - our meaning and purpose in life - thereby preparing ourselves for the "Quality of Life" here and in our everlasting reward and existence.

But such worship also involves a continuing change in character.   We are not to conform to worldly standards.  Instead we are to be transformed" mentally and in terms of our actions.  We are to disentangle ourselves from sin, to be holy,, to be like Christ, to walk in his steps and to let the Holy Spirit make us to be people who are characterized by love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, fruitfulness and self-control.

The Christian, however, must not be solely God-centered and self-centered.  There must also be service to others.  We please God when we are involved in "doing good and sharing."  Indeed, the Christian view of success radically contradicts that of the world in which we live.  "If you want to be great," Jesus said, in essence, "be a servant."  Humble ourselves, and in due time, he will build us up and give us the abilities and ministry that we need and want.

Christlike worship (giving glory to God), Christlike character, and Christlike service (humility) - these are the goals of the Christian life.  And by reaching for these goals, we receive the best "Quality of Life" here on earth and in our everlasting existence.  In one sense we press on to reach these goals, like a runner straining toward the finish line.  But in another sense we grow not by effort, but by yielding ourselves completely to his control and direction.  Christian growth, writes Richard Halverson, "is not the struggle to become the kind of person we think God wants us to be, but a surrender of our bodies, all our faculties, our right to ourselves, to God - that He may make us and mold us into the image of His Son, that through us His life and love and grace might flow."

There is a never ending need for help in Christian growth.  This need is nothing old or new.  For centuries, believers have struggled with spiritual deadness, periods of stagnation, and the need for help in Christian growth.  It could be argued that the entire Bible is written for such people, teaching us about God, his attributes, and his power to mold believers into clean vessels, ready for the Master's use and His reward - Quality of Life.

The causes, effects, training and prevention of spiritual problems are all discussed in the Bible.  No other subjects are more Bible-based and less illuminated by psychology than the subjects of spiritual growth and solving spiritual problems.  And the Christian lifestyle trainer alone can help with such problems since it is only the believer who has "the mind of Christ" to understand and help others comprehend and assimilate "the things of the Spirit of God."

The Causes of Spiritual Problems

It's probably true that most people who have lived an intensely religious life have had to struggle through periods of spiritual dryness and despair.  "Often the intensity of such suffering may be in direct relationship to the intensity of a person's life with God, just as deep valleys show up only in the face of high mountains."  This realization may be comforting, but it does little to help us solve our spiritual problems unless we can identify some possible causes.

1.  Where We Are.  Let us begin with the recognition that for some people the problem is that they are still nonbelievers: individuals who may attend church and engage in "good" behavior, but who still are outside of God's kingdom.

Christianity is not a matter of goodness or badness, of right actions or wrong.  It deals with one's inner nature.  It is more concerned about what we are than what we do.  This is stated repeatedly in Scripture but nowhere with greater clarity than in Ephesians 2.

Prior to conversion we are "dead," controlled by the devil and separated from God, regardless of our deeds.  But it is God who saves us and makes us his children.  This salvation comes not because of our efforts, but because of his giving us salvation when we completely yield ourselves to him.  "For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not a result of works."  When we accept God's gift of salvation, he begins to work, molding us into the kinds of persons he wants us to be.  Since he created us and knows us intimately, his plan is the best for the "Quality of our Lives."

For some, the chief causes of spiritual struggles is that the individuals are still not believers.  For others, there has been a commitment to Christ but there is no real interest in spiritual things and hence there has been no growth.  Such persons may be long-time Christians but they are "babes in Christ," not much different from nonbelievers.  "Where we are" in terms of our relationship to Christ, therefore, has a major bearing on spiritual problems.

2.  What We Do.  Have you ever considered what most disturbed Jesus during his time on earth?  It was not pornography, violence, racism, abortion or the other things which most rankle us today.  Jesus reserved his strongest attacks to condemn sin and to fight what perhaps angered him the most - supposedly religious people representing His Father badly.  Both of these can cause spiritual problems.

(a)  Sin.  This involves specific acts such a lying, stealing, or committing adultery, but as used in the Bible sin involves something more.  Sin is any action or attitude which violates or fails to conform to the will of God.  We can sin by what we think, by what we do or fail to do, and by what we are.  Sin is a powerful force which can master and enslave us, especially when we fail to repent, admit our sin, or to change from committing that sin.  Sin is the major cause of spiritual stagnation and loss of vitality.

(b)  Misrepresentation of Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit, and His Father.  In Jesus' day, the Pharisees were the representatives of God.  They did not interpret His Word properly, imposed their controls over His, did away with the Love relationships He desired, and encouraged following rules rather then having a meaningful relationship with Him through spiritual growth.

But what about spiritual growth?  Does this come by following rules?  Jesus' condemnation of the Pharisees clearly indicates that the answer is "no."  True spirituality comes when we walk humbly before God with an attitude of thanksgiving and praise, accompanied by an awareness of our weaknesses, our tendency to sin, and our need of his continued grace and mercy.  This, of course, does not involve us in a passive "do-nothing attitude."  The Christian must be alert to the devil's schemes and, as we shall see, prayer, meditation on the Bible, fellowship, and a sincere attempt to refrain from sin are all important to spiritual growth.  But the power and even the desire for such holy living must come from God - not from our determination to follow man-made rules.  Clearly the Scriptures condemn both legalism (the strict keeping of rules) and its twin partners: gnosticism (the belief that spirituality is gained by superior knowledge) and asceticism ((the conscious denial of pleasures, experiences and material things).

3.  What We Think.  Most human problems, it seems, begin in the mind.  It is our thinking that leads us to self-sufficiency, pride, bitterness, and non-Christian values - each of which can create spiritual problems.

(a)  Self-sufficiency. This is common in a culture which praises "self-made men" and universally accepts "rugged individualism."  Even in the church we advocate "determination" and "possibility thinking," with little or no reference to the will and power of God.  Self-sufficiency is the mark of lukewarm Christianity.  To the believers who maintained, "I am rich, and have become wealthy, and have need of nothing," Jesus urged repentance and threatened to "spit you out of my mouth."  Self-sufficiency is the absolute antithesis of spiritual maturity.

(b)  Pride.  Self-sufficiency and pride go together.  Pride involves a trust in one's power or resources, and a tendency to derive satisfaction from the contemplation of one's own status, capabilities or accomplishments, especially as these are compared with others who appear to have less.  It has been suggested that pride is more easily seen than defined, and more easily detected in others than in oneself.  Pride is self-centered, self-satisfied and ultimately self-destructive.

(c)  Bitterness. According to the writer of Hebrews, bitterness can spring up to cause trouble and create defilement which apparently includes immoral and godless behavior.  Anger, including bitterness, was discussed in a previous lesson.  It is a powerful and subtle source of spiritual problems.

(d)  Distorted Values.  What is really important in life?  The answer to this question is often seen in how people spend their money, their time (including their spare time), and their mental energies - especially when their mind is free to "wander."  Often, people value money, selfish pleasures, business success, acclaim and other issues which are important in the society but destructive to Christian growth.  Such values are subtle in that they draw us away from God and create a false sense of security.

In contrast to self-sufficiency, pride, bitterness and distorted values, the spiritually maturing person is transformed mentally, so that his or her thinking seeks and intends to do the "good and acceptable and perfect will of God.

4.  What We Lack.  Both physical problems and deterioration can come when there is a lack of food, air, rest and other physical requirements.  In a similar manner, spiritual problems are caused by a lack of those basic ingredients which cause health and growth.

(a)  Lack of Understanding.  Probably, it would be distressing for us to know how much spiritual pain and turmoil arise because people lack understanding and clear biblical knowledge.  Consider, for example, the ideas that we are saved by good works, that God's love and continued approval depend on our personal actions, that Christian growth depends entirely upon ourselves, that doubt or sexual urges will arouse God's wrath, that God punishes acts of disobedience in the Christian's life, or that God doesn't really care about our needs and concerns.  These and a host of similar misconceptions can create restlessness, uncertainty, spiritual doubt and apathy.

(b)  Lack of Nourishment.  Just as a baby never grows without food, so a Christian never develops without continued prayer and reading of God's Word, the Bible.  For some, spiritual problems come because they never spend much time "taking in" spiritual nourishment.  For others, there is so much "giving out" that the giver runs dry.  It is a spiritual law, writes Walter Trobish, that "the one who gives out much must also take in much....  If he gives out continuously without taking in, he will run dry."

(c)  Lack of Giving.  People who eat too much become fat and, in time , uncomfortable.  A similar condition can occur in our spiritual bloating.  Christians are not to be a sponge, soaking up and retaining everything.  Instead, we are to be a "sprinkler" used by God to bring instruction and blessing to others.  The essence of Christian love is giving and sharing - so we don't grow fat. 

(d)  Lack of Balance. During his three-year ministry, Jesus lived a balanced life.  He ministered, interacted with individuals, rested, spent time in prayer and worship, and relaxed with friends.  He had a purpose in life, sought God's help in daily living, and took care of himself spiritually, physically, intellectually and socially.

Many modern people lack this balance.  They "run themselves ragged," fail to get proper exercise or rest, do not eat a balanced diet, and are so busy - even "doing the Lord's work" - that their efficiency and spiritual vitality runs down.  A balanced life requires planning, discipline and a realization that no person in the body of Christ is so important that he or she is indispensable.

(e)  Lack of Commitment.  To be a disciple, Jesus taught, one must be willing to take up a cross and follow him.  True Christian growth must be preceded by a commitment to let Jesus Christ be LORD and CONTROLLER of ONE'S LIFE.  Any "holding back" interferes with spiritual maturing and contributes to lusterless Christianity.

(f)  Lack of the Holy Spirit's Power. The Holy Spirit lives in the life of every believer, but the Spirit can be quenched and pushed aside.  When that happens, spiritual lethargy is assured.  In contrast, when the Holy Spirit controls a life, that life develops strength, understanding, unity with others, love, joy, peace, self-control and the other spiritual fruit - all of which are designed to bring glory to Christ.

(g)  Lack of Body Life.  The Christian is part of a group or "body" which consists of other believers, all of whom are important and gifted, all of whom love Christ,, and each of whom should seek to know, love, pray for, help, encourage, challenge, exhort, teach and minister to the others.  When Christians attempt to grow on their own, to build their Christian "empires" or rise on the Christian status ladder, they are out of God's will.  He has placed us in the body and expects us to grow there, not forsaking the other brothers and sisters.

5.  What We Fight.  Whether or not we consciously recognize it, the Christian is in a battle.  Jesus was tempted when he began his ministry - and surely at other times thereafter.  The giants of the faith, both those mentioned in the Bible and others, battled the forces of evil, and the struggle continues today.  In this continuing world war there are no islands of neutrality.  We are either fighting the devil or aligned on his side - in attitude if not in activity.

At times the battle is in the intellectual arena - where confusion, doubts, nonbiblical thinking, and overt heresy are at issue.  Sometimes the battle is physical as we struggle with disease and injury.  Often the conflict centers around psychological discouragement, anger, anxiety, guilt and other internal conflicts.  At times - especially when we are tired, not feeling well, emotionally or intellectually drained, fresh from a spiritual retreat, or basking in the light of success - the attack is more intense.  And at times each of us loses a battle.

But to lose a battle is not to lose the war.  The Bible already tells us how to prepare, warns us of Satanic tactics, assures us that the Holy Spirit in us is greater than the devil's forces, and declares that Satan in time will be banished forever.  In the meantime, the fight continues, and some people crumble spiritually because they are unprepared and not alert.

6.  What We Receive.  The sufferings of Job do not really fit any of the above categories (although it could be argued that Satan was really battling God by trying to bring down Job).  Job's struggles came from the devil, with God's permission, for reasons which Job never understood.  As we look over the preceding paragraphs perhaps we see most of the causes of spiritual problems.  By identifying the causes we can identify the place to focus our training.  But the ways of God are not always comprehensible by our little human minds.  Sometimes we must stand with Job, shake our heads, wonder why, and end with an ultimate trust in the sovereignty of him whose ways re not our ways and whose thoughts are not our thoughts.

The Effects of Spiritual Problems

Spiritual problems create spiral effects.  Many of the causes listed above also become effects.  An attitude of pride, for example. often leads to more pride.  Sinn stimulates more sin.  Wrongful representation of God breeds more of the same.  Self-sufficiency, distorted values, misunderstandings, selfishness, theological error - these are all like creeping vines which keep getting larger and more able to squeeze out the vestiges of spiritual life that remain.

In addition to the causes which also become effects, there are other results which come from spiritual problems in a person's life.

1.  Spiritual Effects.  When spiritual problems are left unchecked they can lead to compromising behavior, an increasing tendency to miss worship services and personal devotions, spiritual naiveté, a decreasing sensitivity to the Holy Spirit's leading and control, hypocrisy and phoniness, a boredom with religious activities and a greater tendency to self-reliance.  The fruit of the Spirit - love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control - are experienced less and shown to others with decreasing frequency.

These spiritual effects are not evident immediately.  Many spiritually dry or dying people are good actors - especially if they know and can use the accepted theological jargon.  Even Moses, whose face once shone as it reflected God's glory, tried to hide from his fellow believers.  he put a veil over his face so that the Israelites could not see that the spiritual glory was fading away.  Many people do the same today.  They hide their fading spirituality behind a veil of clichés or pious (but hypocritical) actions.  It is not until they turn to the Lord that the veil is taken away.

2.  Physical Effects.  It is well known that psychological tension and conflicts can influence us physically.  This is known as psychosomatic illness.  Apparently there is also a spiritually produced sickness and even death.  Not all sickness results from the sick person's sin, but sometimes sin does lead to illness.

3.  Psychological Effects. Guilt feelings, self-condemnation, discouragement, anger, fears, defensiveness, insecurities, misplaced values - each of these can have a variety of causes, but each can also be the result of spiritual deadness or waning vitality.

4.  Social Effects.  Christian fellowship can be a beautiful experience, but Christian fights can be vicious.  In describing spiritual immaturity, the Apostle Paul listed two characteristics as being of special significance: jealousy and strife.  When there is spiritual growing, the barriers between people disintegrate; when there are spiritual problems, then unkind criticism, cynicism and interpersonal tension are among the first and clearest signs of trouble.

5.  Evangelism Effects.  Confined to a Roman prison, Paul once wrote about people who were preaching the gospel, not from motives of good will, but out of selfish ambitions," hoping to stir up envy and strife.  The same situation exists today.  Many men and women seem so intent on building followers or converting people to their own point of view, that the Person of Christ is forgotten, even though his name may be mentioned often.  The true disciple points people to Christ and seeks to have a part in building a body of believers that have Christ as their Lord (and who is control of their lives) not being in man-controlled lives.    When Christ is pushed behind the glory of some human leader, even a Christian leader, then we surely have evidence of spiritual insensitivity, distorted values, and deadness in the leader and/or in the followers.

Training and Spiritual Problems

The approach and course of spiritual training depends largely on the nature of the trainee's problem.  If the trainee raises theological questions, for example, the training might differ from help given to a person who is involved in deliberate sin.  If a trainee is sincerely concerned about spiritual lethargy, our approach might differ from that taken with a trainee who is bitter and unwilling to change.  As with every other type of training, therefore, it is important for trainers to listen carefully, to show acceptance and empathy, and to determine - if possible - what the real problem is, and what are its causes.  As you listen and talk with trainees who have spiritual problems, remember that this type of training involves the following:

1.  Prayer.  Before, during and after training, the trainer must seek divine guidance.  More than any other form of helping, spiritual training can involve us in conflict with satanic forces.  For this reason the trainer needs special strength, wisdom and direction.  At times you may choose to pray directly with the trainee.  Always you should spend at least some time alone in prayer concerning the trainee.

2.  Modeling.  In a thought-provoking book, David Mckenna has shown how the life os Jesus should and can be a model for every believer.  But since Jesus is no longer here inn the flesh, the best models that many people have are Christians in whom Christ lives.  On several occasions the Apostle Paul repeated the theme: "Be imitators of me, just as I also am of Christ."  Peter urged church leaders not to be "lording it over those allotted to your charge" but instead to "be examples to the flock."  Whether or not we seek or desire the role, Christians - including Christian trainers - are examples of Christian living.  The trainer who is not seeking to imitate Christ and to grow as a Christian will not be effective in spiritual training.  The trainer who wants to be effective in training those with spiritual problems must recognize that he or she is a model which trainees will follow - and occasionally react against.

3.  Exhorting.  As used in the Bible, this word does NOT mean  "to preach at someone," to use sharp words or to demand obedience.  Exhortation involves a God-given ability to come alongside to help, to strengthen those who are spiritually weak, to reassure those who are wavering in their faith, to support those who are facing adverse circumstances, and to encourage those who lack assurance or security.  At times the trainer will point out sin, gently challenge the trainee's thinking or conclusions, encourage the trainee to change, guide as decisions are made, and give support as new behavior is attempted.

4.  Teaching.  Trainers teach by example but they also teach by instruction.  Spiritual training is often a gentle, sensitive form of Christian education (with the emphasis on the very practical and personal application), conducted on a very personal - one-to-one basis.  Such teaching may involve giving information, answering questions, making suggestions, stimulating thinking, pointing out errors, and sometimes giving advice.  The teaching may concern a variety of issues, often including one or more of the following.

(a)  The Attributes of God. Confusion and spiritual problems often come to those who understand and ponder one or two attributes of God while overlooking or forgetting the others.  To emphasize the wrath of God without seeing his mercy is to plunge us into fear and guilt.  To stress his mercy and love without his holiness and justice can lull us into a false sense of security and non-concern about spiritual issues or responsibilities.

A right conception of God is basic not only to systematic theology but to practical Christian living as well....  There is scarcely an error in doctrine or a failure in applying Christian ethics that cannot be traced finally to imperfect or ignoble thoughts  about God....  Among the sins to which the human heart is prone, hardly any other is more hateful to God than idolatry....  The essence of idolatry is the entertainment of thoughts about God that are unworthy of Him.

God wants us to know him.  That, writes James packer, is our main purpose in life.  "Once you become aware that the main business that you are here for is to know God, most of life's problems fall into place of their own accord."  Knowing God is a continuing challenge which no human mind could ever complete.  It is a process which comes first by listening to God's Word, seeking to understand, to obey and to apply it to our lives, through the help and guidance of the Holy Spirit.  Secondly, we know God by thinking about his character as revealed in the Bible and in the world, and expressing thanks for his love and fellowship.  Third, we know God by obeying his commands.  Then we know God through participation and service in his body, the church.

The trainer has the challenge of helping trainees to know God.  Such knowledge rarely comes by hearing lectures about God.  The trainee must see God in the trainer's life style, conversation, attitudes and periodic references to Scripture.  Such teaching places considerable responsibility on the trainer.  We cannot teach others to know God unless we ourselves are growing in this knowledge in the ways mentioned in the preceding paragraph.  Helping trainees to know God, therefore, requires a knowledge and spiritual depth that far exceeds the teaching of any course on training.

(b)  Christian Love.  Love - the giving, sacrificial, unconditional, Christlike love that is described in 1 Corinthians 13 - has been called "incomparably the greatest psychotherapeutic agent; something that professional psychiatry cannot of itself create, focus, nor release."  It is the attribute of God which led him to care for us and to send his Son to earth so that we might become personally acquainted with the Divine.  Trainees need to hear about God's love.  Even more, they need to experience and observe this love as it flows from God, through the dedicated trainer 9and other Christians), into the lives of trainees who feel unloved, unaccepted, guilty, confused and spiritually needy.

(c)  Sin and Forgiveness.  The Bible never "covers over" sin or denies its prevalence and destructiveness.  God hates sin and eventually punishes unrepentant sinners.  In contrast, those who are "in Christ Jesus' are not condemned.  God's Son, Jesus Christ, came to pay for our sins.  When we sin, therefore, there is a way to be forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."  This can be a liberating realization.  God doesn't want sacrifices and penance.  He wants confession and a desire to change.  When he hears our confession he forgives and completely forgets.

The Bible also instructs us to confess our sins to one another.  This is not done to get divine forgiveness, since God alone forgives and only when we confess to him directly.  Confession to others can be therapeutic, however.  Often it stimulates others to forgive us and sometimes it helps us to forgive ourselves.  Confession to others can also be  accompanied by the healing power of prayer.

The trainer must share this biblical perspective on sin and forgiveness.  At times, it will be necessary to confront trainees with their sin.  In so doing, the trainer must show a forgiving, nonjudgmental attitude.  We cannot talk about forgiveness, but refuse to demonstrate forgiveness.

9d)  Holy Spirit Control.  It has been said that the most important thing in the life of any Christian is to be filled with the Holy Spirit.  In Ephesians 5:18 Christians are commanded to "go on being filled with the Spirit," a process which involves the following:

• self-examination (Acts 20:28, 1 Cor. 11:28);

• confession of all known sin (1 John 1:9);

• complete voluntary submission to God 's control over our life (Rom. 6:11-13);

• asking in prayer for the Holy Spirit to fill us (Luke 11:13);

• believing that we then are filled with the Spirit, and thanking God for this (1 Thess. 5:18).

Spirit-filling is not a "once-in-a-lifetime" event.  It is a daily process of "breathing out" sin through confession, and "breathing in" the fullness of the Holy Spirit.  Such repeated filing (which is somewhat equivalent to "walking in the Spirit") is not always accompanied by emotional "highs" or ecstatic experiences (although these do come at times), but it does lead to joyful thanksgiving, to mutual submission, and to the development of love, peace, patience, self-control and other fruits of the Spirit.

Many of the spiritual problems discussed in this lesson arise and persist because believers attempt to solve the problems and grow on their own.  It is the Holy Spirit who teaches, strengthens and empowers us to meet and overcome the spiritual problems of life.  Trainees must be aware of this foundational truth.

(e)  Discipleship.  In the Great Commission, Jesus instructed believers to "make disciples" - a process which involves evangelism and Christian education.  At times, the trainer will want to evangelize, sharing the good news of the gospel.  At times, the trainer and trainee will discuss the meaning and importance of Bible study, prayer, trust in God, meditation, discipline in our devotional lives, and reaching out to others. 

We proclaim Him, admonishing every man and teaching every man with all wisdom, that we may present every man complete in Christ.  And for this purpose I labor, striving according to His power, which mightily works within me.

With qualifications, it might be stated that this is the trainer's ultimate purpose.  The qualification comes because some well-meaning but insensitive trainers have been too hasty in presenting the gospel and urging trainees to make a commitment to Christ.  To proclaim, admonish, teach and present everyone "complete in Christ" is an ultimate goal, but this can be done too abruptly, too quickly and too enthusiastically.  After seeking the Holy Spirit's leading, the effective and sensitive trainer gently moves into discussions of spiritual matters, aware that it is the Holy Spirit who convicts people of sin and brings them to repentance and growth as disciples.  We are to be divine instruments in that process.

(f)  Balance.  Trainees with spiritual problems need to be alerted to the importance of such "non-spiritual" influences as proper diet, rest, recreation and exercise.  Help trainees develp a balanced life style which avoids misrepresentation of their Lord and self-sufficiency; deals with pride and bitterness (through discussion, understanding and prayer); reexamines values, goals and priorities; eliminates theological misunderstanding; and evaluates the problems of spiritual undernourishment and overfeeding (with is accompanying lack of giving).

(g)  The Body.  Christianity, as we have stated earlier, is not a "do-it-yourself" religion.  God made us social creatures and recognized that it is not good for us to be alone.  Clearly in the Bible, the church is pictured as a body which has many parts.

Each person in the body is important.  Each has been given one or more special gifts (such as teaching, counseling, hospitality or evangelism).  Each is expected to develop these gifts in order to serve and "care for one another," and to build up the church, "so that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom belongs the glory and dominion forever and ever."

Christian training can be only minimally effective if it exists apart from the body of Christ, the church.  Believers are instructed to help one another and bear one another's burdens.  When trainees experience this acceptance and support, they are better able to work on their spiritual and other problems within the confines of the training relationship.

(h)  The Devil.  At times, and in some Christian circles, it seems that Satan gets more credit than he deserves.  The devil is blamed for all problems, rebuke and exorcism are the preferred methods of "problem-solving," and there is no place for compassion, understanding and sensitive Christian training.

In an overreaction to such distorted teaching, it is possible to forget that Christians are in a battle, that exorcism may be the preferred method of treatment in some rare cases, and that ever trainer should constantly be alert to satanic influences in all our lives.  Ephesians 6 warns us to "pray at all times in the Spirit,.... for all the saints."  We are to stand firm against the devil, not trying to resist him with our own strength, but "in the strength of His might."

Trainees can misinterpret our comments about Satan and sometimes develop paranoid fears of the demonic.  The trainer, therefore, should use discretion in mentioning Satan and should be alert to correct trainee misconceptions about the devil.  His influence and power should be clearly understood, alertly recognized, and firmly resisted with determination and the Holy Spirit's power.  Most Christian trainees will be able to understand both the devil's influence, and the resounding truth that the Holy Spirit who resides in us is greater than the devil who is in the world.

Preventing Spiritual Problems

The church exists as a company of God's people, called out from the world to live for Christ.  According to Ray C. Stedman,

The supreme thing, the paramount thing, the thing God is after above everything else is to produce in this present world men and women who are like the humanity of Jesus Christ.  he does not want white-robed saints, or accomplished churchmen, or religious experts; what he wants is that you and I may be grown up, responsible, well-adjusted, wholehearted, human beings like Jesus Christ!

This task is the responsibility of the church.  When the church is doing its job properly, many spiritual problems will be prevented.

It should be noted, however, that the believer can always expect to have some trials, tribulations and temptations.  Jesus called us to "take up a cross" in following him.  His life on earth was not easy and he never promised that we would be free of problems.  Instead, we are told that such difficulties can enable  us to grow.

In spite of this, the Christian trainee can be taught, through training but especially through the church, how to prevent some of the spiritual problems of life.  The preventive measures, surely well known to most Christian leaders, include the following:

• Commit one's life to Christ's control and accept him as Lord and Savior.

• Develop the practice of regular, consistent prayer and Bible study.

• Practice the regular confession of sin and filling of the Holy Spirit.

• Become involved actively in a local body of believers.

• Reach out to others in evangelism, service and fellowship.

• Be alert to the devil and resistant to his influences.

This is not presented as a simplistic formula to prevent all spiritual problems.  It is a basic foundation upon which the church's preventive and discipleship program must build.

Conclusions about Spiritual Problems

Of all the issues discussed in this book, perhaps none is more familiar to Christian leaders and trainers than the spiritual problems considered in this lesson.  These problems have concerned godly men and women for centuries, and the Bible deals with these in more detail than any of the other issues considered in this course.

Since the Bible speaks so frequently about spiritual problems, some believers have concluded that ALL of our problems are really spiritual and that all can be solved through the discovery and application of some biblical principle.  While we can admire the theological dedication of many who hold such views, this is not the perspective of the preceding lessons.

Spiritual problems have causes and solutions that most often are described in the Bible.  The Bible, however, never claims to be a psychiatric diagnostic manual and textbook of Christian lifestyle training.  While all problems are spiritual in that they involve the trainee's specific relationship with God.  For example, problems caused by faulty learning, misinformation, early traumas, environmental stress, physical illness, misperception and confusion over decision-making, may or may not be addressed by biblical writers.  Training people with these problems  may use techniques de rived from Scripture.  More often they use methods consistent with the Bible's teachings and values, but discovered and developed by social science and common sense.

Christian training, then, is deeply concerned with the issues discussed in this lesson, but it goes further.  It recognizes that all truth, including psychological truth, comes from God - sometimes through secular psychology and psychiatry books.  The Christian evaluates such secular findings against biblical teachings and discards what is inconsistent with the Bible.  What remains is then used, along with and in submission to biblical teachings.  The trainer, so equipped, then seeks to be used by God to touch lives and change them so that people on earth can be helped to live with greater meaning, stability, fulfillment, spiritual maturity and "Quality of Life."

The Leader's Pitfalls

Every year thousands of leaders shipwreck their careers, their organizations, and their families by making careless, foolish choices.  Why is it that some leaders go from victory to victory, year after year, while others begin with great promise but eventually crash into oblivion?  This lesson examines ten of the most common pitfalls that cause Christian leaders to fail.

Pride

pride may well be leaders' worst enemy, and it has caused the downfall of many.  Pride is dangerous to unwary leaders because it can be subversive in the way it creeps into their lives.  Pride shows up in a variety of disguises, some of them obvious, others more subtle, but all of them lethal to leaders' effectiveness.

Pride Tempts people to Take the Credit from Others.

It is demoralizing for followers to labor on behalf of their organization, only to have their leader enjoy the accolades for the success. Whereas authentic leaders shoulder the responsibility for the poor performance of their organizations, wise leaders rightfully acknowledge the efforts of their followers as critical to their organization's success.  Leaders cannot always be as liberal as the they want with monetary rewards, but they can be generous with the genuine praise and gratitude they express to their people.

Pride, however, tempts leaders to monopolize the credit for their organization's success.  Pride drives leaders to see the limelight.  pride moves them to magnify their own involvement and to minimize the efforts of others.

Pride causes Christian leaders to take the credit not only for what their people have done but also for what God has accomplished.  Christian leaders are God's servants, but pride can cause them to act as if God were their servant, obligated to answer their selfish prayers and to bless their grandiose schemes.  They direct attention to themselves rather than to God.

Pride Makes Leaders Unteachable

Pride closes leaders' minds.  Their pride convinces them that they alone possess the depth of insight for success, and they become impervious to wise counsel.  They grow impatient with those who do not readily accept their opinions.  They rob themselves of enormous potential opportunities, all because they are unteachable.

No matter how talented or how smart a leader may be, an unteachable spirit is the path to certain failure.  If there is any quality common to all effective Christian leaders, it is a teachable spirit.

Pride Causes Leaders to Think They Are Self-Sufficient

Pastors have stood at the helm of megachurches one week and resigned in shame the next.  Leaders who allow pride to blind them to their total dependence upon God's grace and the support of their people will eventually be humbled.  Pride exalts people to think they are self-sufficient.  Pride targets successful leaders, convincing them they have enough talent, wisdom, and charisma to achieve whatever they set their minds to do.  Pride causes leaders to believe they can be lackadaisical in their obedience to God's Word.  Leaders are most vulnerable in the area of their greatest strength.  When they are enjoying their greatest success is when they are most vigilant against pride causing them to fall.

Young leaders can fall into the trap of relying solely on themselves, because experience has not yet taught them otherwise.  But older leaders who should know better are also vulnerable to the pitiful of self-reliance.  Because of their success over the years, some grow to believe they do not need counsel and support from others in order to lead.  They may particularly disdain the suggestions of younger, less-experienced colleagues.  As a result, they become detached from their followers and out of touch with the reality of their situation.

Christian leaders must be especially careful not to presume upon God's blessings.  Wise leaders always recognize that they can do nothing apart from their intimate relationship with Christ (John 15:5).

Pride Leads to a Loss of Compassion

God castigated spiritual leaders who looked upon their followers as sheep to be fleeced rather than as a flock to shepherd (Ezek. 34:1-10).  These would-be spiritual leaders led for what they could gain rather than for what they could give.  The people were being scattered and abused by others, yet their leaders' only concern was for their own comfort and gain.

Leadership is a high calling.  It is a God-given privilege.  Leaders have the opportunity to enrich the lives of their followers, and they also have the influence to do so.  But when leaders lose the passion to contribute to their organization and begin to focus instead on what they can receive from it, they are no longer authentic leaders.  They develop a sense of superiority that regards people as mere parts of the organizational machinery.  They see themselves as entitled to whatever they can get from their organization.

A sure sign that pride has taken root in leaders' lives is that they lose compassion for those they are leading.  When leaders become calloused to the hardships of their people, their pride has desensitized them.  Leaders who become preoccupied with their own personal accomplishments, and are oblivious to the needs of others are not worthy of the call to lead.  Pastors who are unmoved when a church member is hurting, or who are ambivalent when one of their flock falls by the wayside, are abusing the privilege of Quality of Life.    History shows that such insensitive leaders eventually meet their demise.  True leaders never lose sight of their responsibility to care for their followers.

Pride Makes Leaders Vulnerable

Pride is a sin, and pride will do what sin does.  It destroys.  Leaders who allow pride to grow unchecked will eventually lose everything - their relationships, their credibility, and ultimately their position as a leader.

Sexual Sin

If pride is the most insidious pitfall of leaders, sexual sin is the most notorious.  The media have meticulously chronicled the spectacular downfalls of leaders who succumbed to sexual temptation.  Sexual sin has the heinous power to destroy a career, a family, and a reputation, all in one blow.  With such lethal consequences one would think that leaders would fastidiously avoid sexual temptations.  Yet year after year, society recoils under the continuous barrage of public sexual scandals.  This does not have to happen.  Leaders  can avoid this pitfall by proactively building safeguards into their lives.

Safeguard #1: Leaders Make Themselves Accountable

The time to enlist friends ass partners in accountability is not when sexual temptation is already a raging inferno but before the first spark.  Time after time, disgraced leaders admit that although they were surrounded by people, they had no close friends with whom they were transparent and who were in a position to hold them accountable.  They will say that once they began to stray into sin, they deliberately avoided those who could have helped.  prudent leaders are proactive; they enlist at least two people as accountability partners and give them the freedom to regularly question their moral purity.

Safeguard #2: Leaders Heed Their Own Counsel

Leaders should listen to their own counsel.  There is probably not a fallen minister who did not previously warn his church members about the dangers of sexual immorality.  Christian leaders know full well what sexual sin is as well as the consequences involved.  Christian leaders must understand that they are no more immune to moral failure than those they are leading.  Therefore, as they share their wisdom with others, they should apply it to their own lives as well.

Safeguard #3: Leaders Consider the Consequences

Leaders should carefully and regularly contemplate the consequences if they were to commit sexual sin.  They guard themselves from the attitude that they are somehow exempt from the dangers that have derailed others.  They guard themselves from the attitude that they are somehow exempt from the dangers that have derailed others.  They reflect on the ugly reality of what their sin would do to their spouses, to their children and to God's name.  They think through the lengthy restoration process that would be necessary for them to regain the position they were in before they sinned, all the while recognizing that there really is no going back - while they might gain forgiveness, they would never be able to undo sin's painful aftermath.  They remind themselves that one careless, selfish decision could cost them their job, their reputation, their friendships, their family, and it could severely damage their relationship with God.  Astute leaders cultivate the habit of regularly pondering the devastating effects of sexual sin.  Then, when they are tempted, they are armed with a vivid awareness of sexual sin's deadly consequences, and they will not be unwitting victims of sin's treachery (Prov. 7:24-27).

Safeguard #4: Leaders Develop Healthy Habits

Careful leaders can take practical steps to protect themselves from sexual temptation.  Leaders who are married should enlist their spouses to help them develop habits that will protect them from sexual sin.  Wise leaders take the concerns and warnings of their spouse seriously.  Godly leaders cultivate their relationship with their spouse so they are less vulnerable to temptations that inevitably come.  Many leaders who travel will set up pictures of their spouse and children in their hotel room as a reminder of the loved ones they have waiting for them at home.  Astute leaders will also seek the aid of an administrative assistant to make sure they do not find themselves in compromising positions with people of the opposite sex.  Leaders can make sure there are windows in their office doors to protect against even the hint of impropriety.

Safeguard #5: Leaders Pray and Ask Others to Pray for Them

The most practical step leaders can take is to pray that God will help them keep their lives above reproach.  Leaders may be blindsided by unexpected events, but God never is.  God, in his grace, will build a hedge of protection around leaders who earnestly desire moral purity.  Leaders should also enlist the prayers of their spouses so they know that wherever they go and whatever they face, their spouse is interceding with God for them.  The tragedy of sexual sin is that it is just as avoidable as it is devastating.

Cynicism

Leadership is a people business, and people invariably let you down.  Anyone who has led for very long has dealt with people who were dishonest, lazy, or incompetent.  Leaders also inevitably face unfair criticism.  Sometimes people even abuse them verbally.  At some point, people will question leaders' motives and second-guess their decisions.  People who lead will also undergo failure as a matter of course.  Any one of these experiences has the potential to harden leaders' hearts and to make them cynical.  Attitudes, unlike circumstances, are entirely within the control of leaders.  Leaders who surrender their positive attitude have resigned themselves to be mediocre leaders at best.

If leaders always focus on their organization's problems and weaknesses, then the attention of their people will invariably be drawn there too.  When leaders are constantly criticizing others, they are modeling a critical spirit for their people.  True leaders focus on that which is right and on what gives hope, not on what is wrong.  Unfortunately, leaders who have been criticized in the past or who have failed in earlier attempts to lead can be skeptical about future success.

When leaders sense they are developing a cynical attitude, they must correct it immediately before it poisons their effectiveness and possibly their health.  Without question, a critical spirit in Christian leaders reveals that their hearts have shifted from God.  Only a conscious decision to return to God will save the leader from becoming ineffective.  A cynical spirit reflects a lack of belief in God and his ability to do what he says he will do.  Christian leaders have every reason in the world to be positive and optimistic for the future.  They serve the King of kings.

Greed

Like many things, money and possessions can be either good or bad in a leader's life.  While a sizable income is not in itself wrong, the relentless pursuit of one is.  The hunger for wealth and possessions can destroy spiritual leaders.  People valuing wealth above everything else will strive for jobs that pay more, regardless of whether these jobs cause great hardship to their families.  Christian leaders have learned that money is not the most important thing in life.  obeying God's will is.  Wise leaders do not allow themselves to be enslaved to money but instead use their money to glorify God.

Wise leaders know that the measure of their success is not the size of their bank account but the quality of their lives.  Astute leaders invest their lives in things that bring the most lasting and gratifying rewards.

Mental Laziness

Today's problems are not generally solved through brute strength but through creative, inspired thinking.  problem solving is an essential function of leadership, so leaders cannot afford to become intellectually stagnant.  Good leaders never stop learning.  They seek the company of wise people.  They read books and articles that stretch their thinking.  They read the biographies of great leaders and thinkers.  They don't simply read the popular, predigested books that flood the market.  They find authors who challenge their presuppositions and who bring fresh insights to their field.  Ask true leaders what they have read lately, and they will readily cite something they are currently studying.  Christian leaders regularly test what they read against the eternal wisdom found in Scripture.

Christian leaders also allow the Holy Spirit to guide their thinking so that it is based on God's timeless truths rather than on society's latest fad.  Great leaders are always learning how to become better leaders.  A commitment to learn and to change produces a growing level of leadership competence.  Additional learning is mandatory to keep a job.

Leaders are not only readers; they are thinkers.  True leaders take time to process the events around them.  When a meeting goes poorly, they don't simply race off to their next meeting; rather, they take time to evaluate why the meeting was unproductive, and they consider ways to do things differently the next time.  When leaders have personnel who are struggling, they do not simply fire them or grow increasingly frustrated with them.  Good leaders take time to ponder what is causing their employees to struggle.  Are they the right people for the job?  Have they been properly trained and equipped?  have they been kept informed?  Are there factors beyond the employee's control?  Leaders don't jump to conclusions.  They process the facts and seek to determine the truth of their situation.  Christian leaders spend purposeful time with God, allowing him to guide their minds to the truth regarding the condition of their organization.  When mature leaders receive praise or criticism, they do not accept or reject it out of hand; they contemplate what has been said so they can continue to mature as leaders.  Difficult circumstances can sometimes catch leaders by surprise, but once an adverse event has occurred, leaders seek to master the situation by careful, God-inspired reflection.  Wise leaders continually learn from the events of their lives as well as from their studies.  They never stop learning or evaluating, so they never stop growing.

Oversensitivity

People who cannot handle criticism need not apply for leadership positions.  Being criticized, second-guessed, and having one's motives questioned are unpleasant but inevitable aspects of leadership.  Great leaders are not immune to criticism; in fact, the criticism they receive is sometimes the most venomous.  It is impossible for leaders to avoid being censured.  Faced with the inevitability of criticism regardless of what they do, leaders must make a choice.  Either they stop leading, or they do what they know is right and trust that God will vindicate them.

If a leader receives ten words of support for every one word of criticism, which voice will ring loudest?  The critic's voice, of course.  Criticism generally carries more weight with people than praise.  Constructive criticism is good for leaders.  They should not only receive such input graciously; they should invite those around them to give it.

How should leaders respond to unfounded rancor from hostile critics?  First, they should honestly examine their hearts to be sure the criticism is without merit.  Leaders must face criticism with integrity before God and before people.  True Christian leaders know it is ultimately God's approval and not people's that matters most.  When leaders know they have obeyed God, they set aside the desire to defend themselves.

True leaders are more interested in doing the right thing than they are in their popularity.  Sometimes, the right thing to do is not the most popular, but Christian statesmen do not allow detractors to deter them from God's will.  Leaders who clearly understand God's will do not waver when misguided or virulent opponents attempt to discourage them.  True Christian leaders seek God's will, and then they follow it without wavering.

Criticism will come, and it will hurt, but it must not be allowed to derail leaders from God's call upon their lives.  Before giving in to the temptation to quit, leaders should revisit what they know God asked them to do.  No amount of opposition or hardship or sacrifice is sufficient to cancel God's call on a person's life.  Leaders would do well to help their families learn how to deal with criticism.

Spiritual Lethargy

For the most part, leaders are driven people.  Their role is to see that things get done.  Their enthusiasm to make things happen will tempt them to forgo the "passive" pursuit of spending time with God.  Most spiritual leaders would list their relationship with God as number one on their priority list.  The danger for them to neglect their time with God is more subtle, because their Bibles are open so often for sermon preparation, counseling, and other religious work.  If they aren't careful, they'll view their Bibles as a textbook rather than as the LIVING Word of God.  They'll begin substituting their public prayer life for their personal conversations with God..

When leaders allow their daily commitments to crowd out their time with Christ, they are slowly cutting themselves off from their lifeline.  No matter how much they accomplish, their lives will suffer.  Their relationships will be damaged.  They will cease to be the husband/wife/parent/son/daughter/friend God wants them to be.

There are a few practical steps leaders can take if they find they have fallen into a rut in their devotional life.  First, they should evaluate the time they set aside to spend with God.  Is it enough?  Is it too rushed?  Does that time face too many intrusions?  Would a different time or setting be more conducive to quiet Bible study, reflection, and prayer?  Would a varied approach to studying God's Word be beneficial?  Perhaps a different Bible translation would give familiar verses a fresh sound and an added perspective.  Perhaps the leader needs to use a devotional tool that will open up the Scriptures in new and profound ways.  If they do not already do so, leaders should begin using a journal to record their daily Christian pilgrimage.

Besides the intrinsic and immeasurable value of knowing God personally, a strong relationship with God holds numerous advantages for leaders.  They clearly know when God is speaking to them.  When they begin to develop unhealthy habits, God speaks forcefully to them and protects them from harm.  When they are making important decisions, God guides them in the best direction.  When leaders are criticized and pressured to conform to worldly standards, God gives inner strength and resolve that enables them to stand firm in their convictions.  Nurturing a strong relationship with almighty God allows leaders the freedom to follow their God-given convictions and to bring glory to God through their efforts.

Domestic Neglect

When holding positions of influence and responsibility, Christian leaders often struggle to balance their role as a leader at work and as a leader at home.  Wise leaders strive to preserve their families in the midst of the pressures on their professional lives.  Most leaders love their families, but many fail to apply the same prioritizing skills they use at work when relating to the most important people in their lives.  Conscientious leaders take their God-given responsibilities for their families seriously.  They do this because they love God; they do it because they love their families.  They also recognize the crucial nature of leaders' families (Deut. 6:4-9).  Leaders' children can represent the future generation of leaders.  Emerging leaders at home have the potential to impact the world even more than their parents did.  Wise leaders see the importance of helping their children develop as Christians and as the next generation of leaders.

As we mentioned earlier, leaders should get in the habit of marking significant events such as birthdays, anniversaries, graduations, and special events on their calendars so they do not inadvertently schedule unnecessary outside commitments on those dates.  When leaders travel, they should look for ways to bring family members with them.  As much as possible, leaders who value their families seek creative ways to make their jobs a blessing to their families instead of a rival for their attention.  God is the family's greatest advocate - leaders who seek God's help will readily receive it.

Administrative Carelessness

Leaders are, by nature, visionaries.  They may focus so much attention onn the vision of where their organization is going that they neglect to build the kind of organization that can actually arrive at the destination.

Ultimately it is the leader's task to ensure that the organization is healthy.  Wise leaders understand that organizations are ultimately made up, not of vision statements, or constitutions, or long-range plans, or core values - but of people.  People are the driving force behind organizations.  Therefore, while leaders are constantly delegating tasks to their people, they are also regularly monitoring the attitudes, effectiveness, and concerns of their people to ensure that the organization is functioning at its optimum potential.  leaders must become adept in two areas, or their organizations will collapse from within: conflict resolution and communication.

One way to determine the health of an organization is to measure how long it takes the top leader to become aware of a problem in the ranks.  Effective leaders are known for their aggressive problem solving.  Leadership positions are not for those who seek to avoid conflict at all costs.  Insipid leaders will avoid people they know are unhappy or upset.  Effective leaders will face problems head on.  Few people actually enjoy addressing conflict, but experienced leaders know that a single problem neglected today can multiply into a cluster of problems tomorrow.  It is always better to deal with problems immediately and to resolve issues quickly within the organization.  True Christian leaders seek conflict resolution.  Alert leaders are quick to facilitate conflict resolution between personal so valuable energy and time are not squandered on superfluous and distracting issues.

Clear, timely communication is absolutely essential to a successful organization.  With careful attention to the vital signs of the organization, leaders can promptly address minor conflicts and prevent issues from escalating into large-scale problems.  One of the greatest hindrances to efficient communication in an organization can be the leader's desk.  Effective leaders do not allow important tasks to pile up on their desk.  Effective leaders do not allow important tasks to pile up on their desks.  Large organizations have virtually ground to a halt while an important decision or piece of paperwork sat on a disorganized leader's desk.  Leaders need to develop the reputation for dealing with important issues promptly and thoroughly.  When leaders are slow with their responses, the entire organization can be delayed as people wait on their leader.  Effective leaders also enlist key associates to oversee daily operations so that the organization does not grind to a halt every time the leader is out of town or on vacation.  A wise leader will invesst in developing and equipping associates.  Effective leaders carefully monitor and maintain organizational machinery, and they ensure that the machinery can run smoothly in their absence.  The benefit of maintaining a healthy organization is that leaders can conduct their business without constantly having a phone attached to their ear and they can enjoy time at home or on vacation without always worrying about work.

Prolonged Position Holding

Skilled preachers recognize that if they haven't made their point after thirty minutes, they might as well send their parishioners home to their roast beef.  Wise leaders also know when the time has come to exit graciously and allow a new leader to step in.  Some leaders have greatly depreciated their effectiveness and diminished their contribution to their organizations by staying in their positions long after their effectiveness was past.

They enjoy the respect and influence that comes with their position as head of the organization.  As a result, they may hesitate to yield their office to younger leaders even when it becomes apparent to everyone else that a change in the organization is needed.  Such leaders can become blinded to the reality that they are no longer as effective in their role as they once were.  Because they were once successful, they assume they are still the one best suited for their job.  Sadly, these leaders often negate much of the positive contribution they made to their organization in their early years because they refuse to make room for the next generation of leaders.  Instead they hold their organization back by their reluctance to step aside.

Leaders with integrity recognize when they have made their most worthwhile contributions.  Then they graciously hand over the reigns of leadership to the next generation.  How does a leader know when the time has come for a changing of the guard?  God will guide leaders who seek his wisdom regarding when it is time for them to leave.

Older leaders tend to have difficulty giving their blessing to the emerging generation of leaders.  Senior leaders often disparage younger leaders as naive or radical or too inexperienced to conduct the important affairs.  Veteran leaders see new and different values.  In fact, while biblical principle and values never change, methods that were appropriate in one generation may be obsolete, even counterproductive, in the next.

Leaders with integrity genuinely place the well-being of the organization before their own prestige.  Christian leaders take time to stand before God and ask whether their continued leadership in the organization is helpful or harmful.  They look to God as the source of their contentment in life, not the job.  Those leaders who have made a commitment to continually grow and learn have no need to cling tenaciously to their position because they know God has new challenges for them and they are ready to embrace his next assignment.

Summary

Developing a healthy awareness of the pitfalls that can bring failure and disgrace to leaders is the first step to avoiding them.  The second step is putting safeguards in place that will provode protection in times of temptation or indecision.  Third, leaders should have before them the continual reminder that (a) their organization is more about people than it is about productivity; that (b) they are not indispensable; and that (c) the most effective, efficient thing they can do for their organization is to maintain a close, vibrant relationship with God.

Christian leaders are forming groups that meet regularly to challenge one another to continue growing in their relationship with God and with their families.  Through e-mail and various technologies, Christian leaders can stay in contact even when they are traveling around the world on assignments.

More and more leaders are recognizing that, with deliberate effort, good planning, and much prayer, they need not succumb to the pitfalls that could impair their leadership and jeopardize their personal lives.  If you have not already become part of a small group, we encourage you to form one.  This group should consist of three to five godly people whom you respect and with whom you will feel free to be completely honest.  Group members should be of the same gender.  For obvious reasons this will exclude your spouse.  Here are some questions to consider both individually and as a part of your small-group discussion.

1. Do I pray regularly with at least one other leader?

2. Are there other leaders with whom I am free to be candid about my personal struggles?

3. Who holds me accountable to follow through on what I know to be God's will?

4. What safeguards have I built around my relationship with my spouse?  Are they adequate to protect me from temptation?

5. How am I presently studying and applying God's Word to my life?

6. Have I built safeguards around my time with God?

7. When was the last time time i clearly heard God speaking to me?  How did I respond to what he said? 

8. Do I have people who are willing to challenge my actions when they think they are harmful?

9. Are the fruits of the Spirit growing in me? 9Gal. 5:22-23).  Am I becoming more and more like Christ?

Messages from God

• Proverbs 27:2

• Daniel 4:29-31

• Proverbs 6:16-17

• Proverbs 1:7; 2:10-11

• Judges 16:15-21

• John 15:5

• 2 Corinthians 11;28-29

• Proverbs 16:18; James 4:6; Luke 18:14

• Proverbs 14;12

• Proverbs 7:24-26

• Galatians 6:7

• Proverbs 14:15

• Isaiah54:17

• John 15:20

• Deuteronomy 6:4-9

• Ezekiel 34:1-10

Student prayer

God, I think that I know what to believe but new things come up almost every day.  Help me to sort out what is right and good to believe, and what is not.  Grant me your wisdom.  Amen.

Homework

1. Thin Prayers, Fat Prayers.  Share two worries and two joys that are going on with you right now.  let's take six to eight minutes for this,

2. Write a prayer for the class members.

3. What are your feelings about what we just did?

4. Remembered Blessings.  Share a time you can remember when you felt close to God.  If this experience included prayer, share how prayer enhanced the experience.  If it did not include prayer, share any possible ways in which the experience may have resembled prayer.

Closing

May our God of intimate love bless us with a constant awareness of his presence.  May God teach us to pray, both along and with others.  May he deepen our relationship with himself daily as we spend time sharing with him, loving him, and seeking his help and his will through prayer.  Amen.